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I’ve never hesitated to be vocal about my anxiety and depression. When I stopped modeling at age 16, and decided to focus more on topics like mental health and my eating disorder, and because of that, I received a really positive response from the media. Now I get an insane amount of emails and messages from kids everyday who are suffering with anxiety, depression, being bullied, an eating disorder…and it’s made me realize that we’re all on this journey called life alone. The only person you have to rely on is yourself. Sometimes you might need an extra therapy session, or you may have to reach out to a doctor or even a hospital for help, which is okay too.

I started a nonprofit in 2016 called M.I.N.T., that I’m hoping to bring back to the public in the fall: M.I.N.T. opened me up to a world of opportunity and interest into the world of mental health: I’ve learnt so much about myself, and teens across the globe since starting a project that revolves around talking to teens in schools: inner city, private, and everything in between. Surprisingly, the kids at the nicest private schools are suffering with the same anxiety and depression, cutting and suicidal thoughts that the kids in inner city schools are battling. Just because you have tons of money and access to opportunities that some people don’t doesn’t mean that you’re happy: as the suicides of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain have shown us.

When Bustle asked to include my anxiety diary in a piece, I jumped at the idea. Why shouldn’t you guys know that my life isn’t all Instagram pictures and YouTube videos? I despise social media because I know that people look at Instagram feeds and pictures and instantly feel like they aren’t good enough to be like the “cool” girls and guys on Instagram. If only you really knew that so much of this world is fake.

Sometimes my life is fantastic, sometimes I feel like I’m high on life, and sometimes I’m depressed. No pretty picture can fix depression or an anxiety attack. Be honest with yourself and the people around you: we’ve all got something going on behind the scenes, and some of us have to put in a little more work to stay happy and healthy!

Here’s what I had to say:

Read the full article here. Know that you’re never alone, and that we’re all on a journey to truly loving ourselves. Even that means exercising 1 day, skipping the gym for 15, eating a burger for breakfast and a cupcake for lunch…does anything truly matter besides you being happy?

Nope.

#FearlessFridays is back! After I went skydiving, I went to London with my family and decided to take a little bit of time off from doing stuff that scares me, because skydiving was such an intense experience for me so I felt like I needed a week off. Now that I’m back in LA, I’m happy to be back to doing something every week that gets me out of my comfort zone. I’ve got this newfound perspective on life, and I am realizing that because you’ve only got this one life to live, you have to live it to the fullest. That theory applies to ALL walks of life, too: parents & kids, I’m talking to you!

Today, I’m heading to Skyspace in DTLA which is a huge slide on a roof that overlooks all of LA: it’s beautiful, but since I really hate heights, it’s an activity that I’ve always wanted to participate in but never really found the need to. Skyspace offered to give us two tickets to check out what they’re about, and I will be filming it to share with the world! Check out the video later today.

Yesterday, I signed a contract for the next phase of my life. I can’t wait to tell you what’s happening!!!!! My lips are sealed but I’m shaking with excitement. My #FearlessFriday for this week was learning to accept change and a new journey: I’ve been working for myself for my entire life, so what I’m about to start is something that I really thought only happened in the movies.

When you’re following your dreams, anything is truly possible.

Episode 33: Let’s talk about Forbes, Kylie Jenner, and how you can become a successful entrepreneur! I’d like to start off by saying that these are completely my own feelings and thoughts, and you have every right to disagree with me. Free speech, people! In this episode, I dive into why I think Kylie Jenner isn’t self-made, and what Forbes did poorly when labeling her as a self-made entrepreneur. I don’t deny that she is incredibly successful, but what is that success due to? That’s for you to decide.

In this episode, I also cover what traits I think all entrepreneurs have, and what you should know when starting your company. You have to be willing to put in a lot of work for (usually) little reward at the beginning: but those who can tough it out and are willing to sacrifice a ton of freedom for their company are the ones who come out strongest at the end.

Listen to Episode 33 on iTunes, SoundCloud and my official TILU app on the app store!

Not sure how to occupy your time this summer? There’s nothing more satisfying than sitting by the pool or on the beach with a solid read. Here’s some of my favorite books, suitable for all walks of life! Click on the link hyperlinked to directly purchase the book.

1. All Jen Sincero books

A few weeks ago, I did an Instagram story asking what books you guys suggested I read- 90% of you suggested I read Jen Sincero’s “You Are A Badass” so I bought the book on Amazon, and am enjoying it so far! I’m not far into it (I’m a very slow reader unless I’m obsessed with the book) but I totally see why it’s a solid choice for a summer read or a read to get you out of a rut. Jen’s writing is easy to read, and her authentic and honest perspective on the world is intriguing. The book is funny too!

2. Tim Bono “When Likes Aren’t Enough” 

I read Tim Bono’s book last year, and highly suggest it for those interested in social media & mental health, along with those interested in the way the brain interprets the content it sees on the internet. Though this book is more “scientific” than other books (he uses a lot of case studies to prove his points), Tim brings up a lot of things about the web that you probably haven’t thought about before.

3. John Green “An Abundance of Katherines” 

I haven’t read this book, but I adore all of John Green’s books and was excited to see he has a new book on the market under Penguin Teen, his publisher. One of John’s most popular books is A Fault in Our Stars, and it’s also a fantastic movie!

A synopsis: When it comes to relationships, everyone has a type. Colin Singleton’s type is girls named Katherine. He has dated–and been dumped by–19 Katherines. In the wake of The K-19 Debacle, Colin–an anagram-obsessed washed-up child prodigy–heads out on a road trip with his overweight, Judge Judy- loving friend Hassan. With 10,000 dollars in his pocket and a feral hog on his trail, Colin is on a mission to prove a mathematical theorem he hopes will predict the future of any relationship (and conceivably win the girl). An Abundance of Katherines was a 2007 Michael L. Printz Honor book and a finalist for the Los Angeles Times Book Prize. It was also named one of the books of the year by Booklist, Horn Book, and Kirkus.

4. Jenna Birch “The Love Gap”

Why do I LOVE The Love Gap? Not just because we interviewed Jenna on This is Life Unfiltered (check out her episode here) but because this book will open you up to a realm of new ideas when it comes to the dating world. Ladies, what’s the real reason behind why he’s not texting you back? Is he/she really just not that into you? Jenna’s personal opinions along with the honest feedback her friends admit will give you all the answers you need to know, and help you remember how kickass you really are.

5. Rupi Kaur “Milk and Honey”

 

Sold at pretty much every book store & artsy store in America, Rupi Kaur’s Milk and Honey is a book filled with poems about the world that we live in. Put your headphones in, choose a chill song, and spend the day by the pool reading her poetry. I wouldn’t suggest this as a book you read everyday, but it’s a simple book with a deeper meaning behind it: an easy read that definitely gets you thinking. I really enjoy the art in the book too: you don’t see tons of handwritten pictures in books nowadays.

On Saturday night, I returned to LA after a long two weeks of being out of town! Initially I was prepared to spend two weeks abroad with my mom, visiting my sister & nephew and London before going to Portugal for a few days, but then my *new* job ended up preventing me from spending too long out of town, so I had to buy a new plane ticket back and leave my mom in London! Hi, mom. I didn’t mind flying back early because I find myself getting really anxious and depressed when I am out of my usually working scenario for longer than 1 week.

For those of you who don’t know, my sister is 16 years older than me (crazy, right) and we have different dads, which is why we don’t look visibly alike. Growing up, people always thought Melissa was my best friend Gabi’s sister. We’re not super similar either: she’s a very straight to the point kind of person…I am too, but way nicer! A few years ago she moved to Istanbul with her now-husband, who she met in Manhattan when he was running a fashion company she got a job at. They fell in love and now live happily in Turkey and have an adorable son named Leo. Isn’t he seriously the cutest thing in the world? He’s so innocent and happy. I always tell him to stay little for forever.

My mom and I had some time to hang out in London without Leo, and while we were walking around one day, we walked right into the Trump protest in Trafalgar Square. Rarely do I discuss politics because I know everyone has a different opinion and it’s not my job to start WWIII with people hating on me for sharing my opinion…but, I’m a democrat and thought Obama was the best president to ever be in the White House. I voted for Clinton, and though I don’t think she’s a great candidate to be President, Trump is totally worse. My mom despises Trump along with me, so we joined in on the march briefly because Trump was in the area that we were visiting. This was my second march to be a part of in 2018! I honestly wish I was more caught up on world news because there’s a lot more that I should know than I do, but recently I’ve made a conscious effort to stay updated with what’s happening in the world. You never know when someone will bring up a world news topic with you and expect you to hold a conversation with them. Log onto BBC, CNN, Huffington Post even and read some articles about what’s happening in the world. It might seem boring, but the more you know about the world, the more valuable you are! If you have the opportunity to ever be a part of any march relating to a topic you believe in: I highly suggest taking part. The energy during any march is invigorating, and makes you feel like you’re really speaking up for what you believe in. What’s better than that?

After my Forbes tweet about Kylie Jenner received a ton of feedback last week, it got me thinking about entrepreneurship and how everyone seems to have a different opinion on what an entrepreneur is. I guess the standard definition is someone who works for themselves, but can you become someone that works for themselves overnight? All it really takes is one idea to take your life in a completely different direction. I’ve always believed that being an entrepreneur is almost like being an artist: you can either draw, or you can’t draw. In my opinion, there’s not really any in-between. Entrepreneurs definitely have different mindsets. However, times have changed drastically since I began my blog, and people across the globe have “side-hustles” that usually end up becoming their main job after a while. The difference between an entrepreneur and someone who doesn’t work for their own company is honestly the determination you have to possess to succeed. Every job takes hard work and effort, but when you work for yourself, you don’t have anyone backing you or anything to fall back on: so it’s a completely different type of determination necessary because if you’re not working all of the time, you won’t be able to live! I certainly think you can become an entrepreneur, but to be in it for the long run you have to be willing to sacrifice a lot to get your company off of the ground & realize that most companies don’t become successful overnight.

What do you think: can you become an entrepreneur overnight?

Over the past 2 weeks, I’ve learned a few new life lessons. One of the most important lessons I’ve learnt is that the media & the Internet aren’t always the happiest, or kindest place, to be involved with. I always take what I see on the web with a grain of salt, but I have to be honest, I’m not used to as much attention as my tweets have been getting! As you know, I’ve never had anything go “viral” and I didn’t start on Vine. If I had, I’d probably be a household name by now. I prefer to inspire people with my hustle and drive and if one day I become a household name, cool! But that’s not why I’m in this career path. Otherwise, I probably would’ve tried dating Bieber or posting content different than I do years ago. I never have looked deeper into the word “overnight sensation” because I believe it means nothing more than just that: overnight. In 2018, if you’re not an overnight sensation the day after you start your company, blog or YouTube channel, then you probably think you’re worthless and want to give up already. Right? It’s not your fault if you think like that, but think of all of the people out there starting companies, some that become successful and many that fail, but if the successful ones had given up after their first failure. Same for actresses: ones who have long careers are scientifically not ones who have become famous overnight. One of my friends asked me why she should start a YouTube makeup channel because of the possibility that no one would watch her videos. I replied back to her:

“Do you think I thought like that when I was writing my blog at 12? Do you think I intended for people to read my terrible writing at 12? NO!”

There needs to be some attention brought to the fact that Kylie Jenner has been labeled a self-made billionaire by Forbes. I am not writing this post to put anyone down, but if people don’t call this Forbes for their labeling of someone who isn’t self-made, many of you trying to start companies might feel like you won’t be successful or become self-made unless you have a wealthy, powerful family or many investors. That’s the complete opposite of the truth. To set the record straight before I get more hate, go Kylie. I’m not into makeup and I think spending $400 on a makeup brush is kind of a waste of money, but you could say me spending $400 on a plane ticket or a pair of shoes is a waste of money too! Here’s the thing: everyone has different opinions and visions on life. I’ve built a platform (and I’m definitely not a millionaire, or billionaire, or in my opinion, even successful yet!) based on my honesty and obsession with showcasing the journey of becoming a self-made entrepreanur. You might not agree with my opinions, and I don’t always agree with my friends or anyone in the media (like anyone who is currently in the White House, please bring Obama back) but you don’t put people down for their opinions. I don’t agree with Forbes and I called them out via Twitter on that, but I don’t deserve to be put down and neither does any other person in the public eye or not. Tweet me your opinion, or your favorite celebrity your feedback on something they say, but realize that everyone is a real human being off of the Internet. We’ve all got feelings, we’re all making mistakes, and we’re all doing our best in the world to be the most authentic and admirable person on & off of the Internet.

So Forbes, I unfollowed you because of this article. I unfollowed you not because of who you chose to put on the cover, but because of what you labeled this person as. As a publication who has featured people like me, and Sara Blakely, and Michelle Grant, and OPRAH!!! and labeled all of us “self-made entrepreanurs” I’m seriously disappointed in your decision to label someone who came from so much the same label you’ve given me. What will other teens out there think of the word self-made now? Maybe you did this to get more press, and get people buying your magazine, but shame on you. People read Forbes during times when they’re not able to sleep at 3 AM because they’re nervous their business won’t succeed, or because they want to feel inspired by someone who went from $0 to $1 million in 10 years. They’re not reading Forbes to learn about an empire built before someone already came out of the womb. Acknowledge success and the ways that people get there: but don’t overlook the journey prior to their success. Every entrepreanur has a different journey, but most don’t come from that much. That’s why entrepreanurs are rare, and special.

All I’ve ever done, and will continue to do, is create new conversations and get people thinking. I welcome your feedback (be nice! no cursing!) via all of my social media platforms, as I always do, but I’m human too. Would you want to wake up to 1000 nice tweets and 1000 mean ones? Nah. There’s space for all of us and all of our companies!

Xo,

Alexa

Before I get tons of questions, I’ve got this gosh darn bruise on my right arm and I have no clue how long it’s been there or what it’s from but I can’t get rid of it! I’m thinking maybe I knocked into something at the gym last week? Or accidentally dropped a weight on my arm and didn’t realize? How does one get a bruise on their right arm? #palepeopleproblems it’s still there as I type this post, too!

On Friday, I headed to Westport which is a town about 2 hours away from where I’m originally from. If you’re familiar with Connecticut, or my story, you’ll know that anywhere about 1.5 hours the opposite way (towards NYC) from me is apparently the richest part of the country. Towns like Greenwich, Westport, and Fairfield are notorious in shows like Gossip Girl for being “the” definition of pretentious. I never grew up going down to those towns unless I was passing through them on my way to NYC when I would take the train from New Haven to Manhattan, but as I grew older, I realized that my small town is just .02% of what Connecticut has to offer. I was supposed to spend the day in Westport with Gabe, but his alarm didn’t go off at 6 AM like mine did (hmmm) so I ended up driving down to Westport while watching the sun come up. It was a beautiful day.

There had been a day trip to Westport in my mind for some months now, since I had reached out to a few salons in Westport that offered to host me in return for a blog post! During the summer, I usually like going blonder, so I emailed a salon I came across called Studio on Main right on the main street in Westport. I met the lovely salon owner, and spent about 3 hours with the team while they made my hair blonder. Everything from the coffee I was offered, to the nice staff, and the awesome aesthetic made the 3 hours in the salon chair fly by. Westport is an upscale area, and you never know whether you’ll be surrounded by tons of snobby people-but Studio on Main was the polar opposite of a stuffy upscale Connecticut town. I can’t get over how much I love being blonde!

After I got my hair done, I stopped for some lunch at a lovely paleo restaurant that I found and had a huge cookie and some almond chicken tenders. Then, I went to New Beauty Wellness for a facial & an organic spray tan. This spa has a medical center (for procedures like botox and fillers, which I will never get done!) but the entire upstairs of this fancy spa is reserved for facials, massages, scrubs, waxes and tanning. My facial was LIFE CHANGING, and made my skin feel super soft and clean after traveling back and forth from NYC to LA to CT within 2 weeks. Traveling really clogs up your pores, and I usually forget to drink as much water as I should before I get on a flight. With my new blonde hair and spray tan, I feel like a new person. Though my tan will fade in a few days, my blonde hair will stay. I love being blonde!

I’ve been a scaredy-cat since the day I was born on October 15, 1997. I was the kid who would go into the doctors office and make every doctor in the building confirm with me 300 times that I would not die from a shot, or the innocent attendant standing at the roller coaster that no one had died that day from a ride. To say the least, I’m neurotic, in the best way possible. 

When #FearlessFridays began, I knew I wanted to push the boundaries for myself and continue to get out of my comfort zone, in the hopes that it would inspire you to as well. So I went skydiving, which is the most out of my comfort zone I could ever get, and I survived. Not going to lie and say I didn’t have SO MUCH anxiety the weeks leading up to it, but I conquered my biggest fear: dying in the sky. So, what are you going to do this week to get out of your comfort zone? And no, you don’t have to do something as crazy as skydiving to get out of your comfort zone! Introduce yourself to someone, start a blog, start an Instagram page, enroll yourself in college…! We all have something that scares us, and we all deserve to conquer that fear. I overcame mine this week: what are you going to overcome?

Thank you CPI Skydive in Ellington, CT for making this experience extremely memorable and not letting me die!!

Xo,

Alexa

I took the majority of this week off, so that explains why I’ve been MIA! I hope you had an incredible 4th of July, even though the state of the country isn’t anything close to what it should be… you have to hope that issues will be resolved sooner than later. Also,WTF did Melania Trump’s jacket actually mean? I think everyone in the White House is nuts, and I really miss Obama. And their dog. But I won’t bring politics into my blog!

Over 1 year ago, Bobby Hobert  emailed me and asked if I’d be open to an interview on his podcast. At this time, I was living in Boston and he was living in Allston, I think either just finishing up college or having already graduated. He runs the podcast “Purpose in the Youth” and he’s interviewed some huge names, like Drama, since he started. We’re both from small towns in MA & CT, so when he asked, I was really intrigued. Podcasts weren’t really popular back then, so I had no clue what I was getting myself into…but we filmed this awesome interview, and he really inspired me to move to LA. Bobby moved out to LA last year, and I moved out around a month after he did…but we didn’t end up seeing each other again until I asked him to appear on This is Life Unfiltered for episode 31! We talked for hours about what’s changed in the past year, and how crazy the transition to LA has been for both of us, hailing from small towns on the East Coast.

Plus, he has some fantastic advice for those of you looking to start podcasts. Listen to Episode 31 below and on iTunes and my app on the app store! #livelifeunfiltered