If you haven’t RSVP’ed to the Vanderbilt University Be Fearless Summit on May 22nd, do so here!
These photos are from the first Be Fearless Summit at Drexel. I can’t wait to meet some of you at the VIP- networking event the night before!
Last week on Instagram I posted a poll wondering if anyone else struggled with making new girl friends. I’ve always struggled with making new girl friends! Being around men and speaking to men feels like second nature to me, especially in business, which I thought was totally contrary to what most (especially young) women deal with. I was wrong. Even as a teenager, making new female friends felt difficult to me. There’s always a feeling of intimidation and drama that goes along with being a girl in a group of other girls.
Unlike men, women have “cliques” and friend groups they don’t always like to get outside of their comfort zone and explore making new girl friends when they’ve got a tribe. I get it. I’ve sworn off making new girl friends for so long because 50% of me feels slightly traumatized from past relationships with (now ex) girlfriends, and ok (not amazing) with the girlfriends I have now. Because of my past experiences with girlfriends, I stopped making new girlfriends and have relied on my existing ones and guy friends to stay social and have fun. As I’ve begun to spend more time in Austin, I realize how easy making new girlfriends may be as long as you put in extra work. I’ll never tell you that you need 100s of friends to be happy because you do not: the less friends you have, the better. But the more people you know and are acquainted with, the more fun and excitement you’ll have in your life.
After my Instagram poll, I spoke to more of you who suggested some of the reasons why making new girlfriends is hard. You’re traumatized from past relationships, you hate drama, and it’s awkward. Forming deeper relationships gets harder and harder as you get older. I hate that! Everyone is stuck in their own way and routines that making new friends when you’re in your early/mid twenties is totally different than when you were on the playground as a kid.
I advised you to look outside of your traditional ways of making friends (get off of Bumble!) and head to a bar or an event you find on Eventbrite or Meetup instead. Making new friends is basically dating but less fancy clothing and way less makeup is required. You just have to trust your gut and go with the flow.
A few places I’ve made new girlfriends are: equally talking to girls or them talking to me, and then I ask them out! I’m telling you: be BOLD. Making new girlfriends is literally DATING but I’m not bisexual, I just want cool new chicks in my life.
The gym! Locker room VIBES. See someone with cool hair? Tell them! Cool sneakers? Ask them where a good run in the area is.
Through my existing girlfriends. For the most part when I do go out I’m going out with my existing girlfriends, and because I only have cool friends, most of my friends do too. I’ve gotten into sticky situations where some of my girlfriends hate that their girlfriends like me more than them or vice versa (if you’ve got friends who introduce you to their friends and then hate that you become closer with them than the friend who introduced you, welcome to the club) but in reality, your existing friends should WANT to introduce you to cool people too. If they don’t, screw them and become friends with their friend.
I DARE YOU to go on Eventbrite and list your own meetup for girls in your town/city, or go on Meetup/Eventbrite and find an existing one. Be optimistic: it might be a boring experience, but you can say you tried. And if you meet no one, you’ll meet someone somewhere else. I promise you!