Images via Jessie Rose Photography

One of the reasons I’ve worked so hard to establish M.I.N.T. as something more than a project that is stronger than D.A.R.E. is because there is always something going on behind the surface. Whether that means someone dealing with something behind closed doors (have you read my Rolling Stone article?) or dealing with tons of chaos behind the scenes at a shoot (did you models don’t always show up?) you and I always have something going on. Occasionally, an outfit I’m supposed to wear won’t fit me as well as I expected- and that brings on tons of negative thoughts in my head. Did I eat too much before this? Did I eat too much this month? How about yesterday?

How about- I stop saying words like that?

It’s easier said than done- but I’m someone who always needs something to work on. And for me, that’s what I always need to work on- loving myself.

I hired a photographer in Sacramento to come and highlight some moments behind the scenes that you guys don’t see. The early mornings, even though I always get to witness the sunrise in a new city, the notes, and the prep are all key steps to getting me prepared that most people don’t see. On this particular day, I had two segments to prep for, two models to count on to show up, and two pages of notes to remember to not screw up.

When I first started a few years ago, I remember I used to get extreme anxiety on set. I still get tons of anxiety, don’t get me wrong, but the more I’ve managed to be successful at my job, the less anxiety I have. So when things don’t go as planned, I still get really anxious. That’s something I’ll have to learn to overcome as I get older.

At the end of the day, we’ve all got something. I’ll be anxious AND obsessed with chocolate until I die- who cares!? What’s life if it’s all too easy, all of the time?

Xo,

Alexa